how do i tell my mom that this “minimalist wooden nativity set” she put up just looks like a forest of dildos
How to use “and” 5 times in a row grammatically:
A man owned a store called “This And That” and hired another man to make a sign for it. When it was finished the owner inspected the work. He discovered that the spaces were wrong so he said “the space between This and And and And and That is different. Please fix it”
IM SO ANGRY
in english today a girl asked me how i put on makeup with my glasses on and i said ‘i take them off’ and she looked at me like
por Mauricio de Sousa http://www.monica.com.br/
MAKE IT OUT LIKE I DESTROYED EARTH BUT IT WAS ONLY NEW YORK
Imagine the glorious moment when we get to Marathon all the Hobbit movies
and then LOTR right after
this cow is prettier than me
Dude someone once told me I look like a cow and I was like “omg really? Have you seen cows? Because I have and they’re fucking gorgeous and adorable, so thanks”
Fun fact: “cow-eyed” was often used to describe Hera’s beauty since the Athenians considered cows faces so beautiful.
Men Experiencing Labor Pains
With their wives supporting them.
HAHAHHAHAHA TOO GOOD
I bet a kick in the balls would feel real good right about then.
“Men can handle anything”
“Women exaggerate everything”
And then they realized just how wrong they were
That was beautiful
wow even zombies feel like we do
this movie was perf tho
This film is basically the socially acceptable version of Twilight.
His name was Romeo.
YOU SPOILED IT FOR ME IT WAS CROSSED OUT BUT I READ IT ANYWAY I HAVEN’T READ THE SEQUELS YET
So, this half black/white kid got a tattoo of the Oreo barcode on his wrist
Why does it matter matter that this guy is mixed race!? You could of just written, “This kid”. Like his fucking skin colour matters! Cunt.
His bi-racial ethnicity is probably the point of the Oreo tattoo joke, cunt.
imagine this kid working as a cashier, and this one customer is pissing them off, so they just casually swipe their tattoo under the scanner, after every item, and later the customer is just like, I DONT REMEMBER BUYING FIFTY CASES OF OREOS. (via)